giveaway! cloth diapering supplies for babymamas and mamas-to-be

Posted on 21. Jun, 2010 by Princess Lasertron.

We have been doing cloth diapers with Alice Elfie from the beginning and we both love it. After using the occasional disposable diaper, Dave and I have been surprised by how easy the cloth ones are to use. I’m not an “earth mama,” but I feel really accomplished and proud when I think about how good cloth is for Alice’s sensitive little buns and that I’m not contributing to the gross piles of disposable plastic diapers in landfills that won’t break down for hundreds of years.

My friend Kelly Ward, owner of Baby Naturally, LLC is sponsoring a giveaway today of a FuzziBunz one-size diaper. Alice uses these–they can either work as a cover for a prefold diaper or as an all-in-one with a washable insert. At night, we use a prefold WITH the insert so she can stay drier and sleep a little longer.

I also love that Kelly’s company is owned by another working mom like me, and that her job fulfills her passion of creating a natural, organic environment for her son and other children. Kelly also believes in using handmade, repurposed items whenever available and she’s been a great supporter of my business!

If you don’t have a baby and aren’t planning for kids, I think it’d also be great to enter for someone you know, or just to have an awesome A+ gift on hand for baby shower season. Kelly’s shop has lots of other great gift ideas too, and tons of stuff I want for myself as a new mom.

To enter just leave a comment here, and I hope you check out Kelly’s website, Baby Naturally LLC. You can really see the love she put into her business on her website which I admire her so much for.

Winner drawn on Friday!

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link love, more thoughts about postpartum life, and a few pictures from this week

Posted on 03. Jun, 2010 by Princess Lasertron.

A few websites and articles I’ve been reading/browsing/enjoying:

• Melissa of Melissa Jill Photography explains why she doesn’t offer discounts–a touchy and challenging subject for many self-employed people
• Tips from Ann Handley on how to get a speaking gig at conferences at events

(more…)

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what no one told me about postpartum life

Posted on 01. Jun, 2010 by Princess Lasertron.

I keep remarking to Dave that we spent so much time preparing for labor and birth, and I am embarrassed to say that it never occurred to me to educate myself about how life would be different–both practically and emotionally–in the weeks after Alice’s arrival. Everyone always says “your body will never be the same.” Or other parents would laugh knowingly when I said things like “I’m moving into a coworking space four weeks later” or “I’ll just bring her along to the photoshoot” or “I’ll just work while I’m nursing.”

What would have been more helpful is if people had given me specific examples of adjustments they made after giving birth. So knowing that, here are my observations for you as a new mom of three weeks. I can’t speak about cesarean recovery or anything other than my own experience, but here we go:

• Have a dedicated postpartum wardrobe. There are a few reasons for this–first, you will want to be able to move freely as you slump into every chair and couch in the house holding your infant, as well as be able to change quickly when your clothes get soiled. And when I say “soiled” I don’t just mean baby poop–I mean sweat (yours and baby’s), lochia, soapy water from baths, snot, tons and tons of milk (which doesn’t smell so great after a few hours), and any other body fluid you can imagine. I recommend getting lots of pairs of XXXXXL cotton underwear, solid colored yoga-type pants (you can wear them in public), solid-colored nursing tanks (I love the ones from Target), and knit cardigans and shawl-type sweaters. I also wear tons of maxi dresses (Forever 21 has them at good prices). Things that wash easily and can be mixed and matched. And I didn’t expect to be changing my shirt 3-4 times a day, so I also recommend buying more than you think you need.
• On that note, you don’t have to look bad and unkempt and frazzled and dirty all the time in public. I thought I would.

• Skip buying maxi pads and just get depends–especially for the first week after childbirth. The amount of discharge that I had was not like a “heavy period.” It was like a mass murder bloodbath. And the blood clots! It’s like, did I have another placenta in there?! I had no concept of postpartum bleeding and I wish I had known what to expect.
• The lack of sleep hasn’t been that hard to cope with. I think mothers must get some kind of new hormone that helps them feel better with less rest. I’ve been getting sleep in four-hour blocks (except on the weekends, when Dave lets me sleep in), but I don’t feel that my energy level is diminished. I don’t know if other mothers have similar experiences though.
• Moms don’t know better than dads. It’s important for dad to have ample alone time with the baby. I have loved watching Dave form his own rituals and routines with Alice, like singing when he changes her and playing different games with her in the tub than I do.
• I never really feel clean although I shower every day (a privilege, I know). Milk dries on my skin, I sweat a lot more than normal, and the changes in my hormones have changed the balance of oils on my skin, causing acne.

• Once again, I had no idea how much postpartum bleeding there would be.
• Four hours can go by in a moment when I’m trying to calm the baby or do “Alice chores.” In four hours, I can answer all my e-mail or make six headbands or 20 boutonnieres or a posie bouquet, and have time to meet a friend for lunch or a client for a meeting. Or in four hours, I can feed Alice and give her a bath. Or do a load of laundry and make myself a bowl of cereal. Maybe.
• Everyone will want to come visit.
• Nothing I bought has been more important than washcloths. Tons and tons of the plainest, most ordinary cheap white washcloths. They work as burp rags (we save our cloth diapers to actually use as diapers), to wipe off sweat and spit-up, and most importantly they soak up all the milk that leaks all over all day long. I was proud to buy several sets of handmade nursing pads from Etsy, but for me they work for about two minutes. Instead I put folded washcloths in my shirts and I go through about eight per day. I know there are bigger problems–I’m glad nursing is going well–but leaking is cold and wet and inconvenient.
• Poopy diapers aren’t that gross.
• People will judge you no matter what…someone will always think you’re the worst mom ever. I recommend not asking anyone for their opinion unless you really want to hear it.

• Although babies sleep 16-19 hours a day, I still don’t often find more than an hour or two to get anything done. I have mastered sewing while nursing, and being able to hold the baby in a wrap helps, but when baby naps there are so many other things to do–tidying the living room for the barrage of guests constantly arriving, keeping the dishes done so the baby can take baths in the sink at a moment’s notice, keeping breast pump/bottles washed immediately so they don’t get stinky, constantly running loads of laundry up and down the stairs and folding the laundry. Plus work.

Today has been a challenge–I have two side projects due to clients and I’ve been up for the last 7 hours with my wide-awake, alert genius baby. Now it’s almost 5pm and dad will be home, so hopefully I can take that time to tackle those work projects! What a lesson in prioritizing this has been. What do you do when you are working two dream jobs?

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Alice goes to CAMP

Posted on 27. May, 2010 by Princess Lasertron.

I met my friend Eric Downs of Downs Design and the landlord Bob Grinnell at CAMP today to check out the buildout progress and take some photos. My grandparents are in town and they came too with my mom.

Getting my key to the door!

A lot of people have been asking for more information about visiting CAMP this Summer, and I will let you all know when we launch our website. I don’t have answers to a lot of your questions yet! Right now we are focusing on finding furniture and fleshing out how everything is going to come together with our tenants and website. It’s such a fun process but so much work!

I have a five-year lease and I keep thinking about how Alice will be in KINDERGARTEN before the lease is up–that blows my mind! I think she will have fun growing up at mama’s office.

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“You have a lot of balls up in the air.”

Posted on 23. May, 2010 by Princess Lasertron.

Two-week old baby (already!). Developing and promoting a line of party dresses. Fulfilling around 10 bridal orders every month. Stepping out a project and planning a photoshoot this week for an upcoming book. Managing the buildout of CAMP and looking for furniture (not to mention finding tenants!). Working with my friend Eric to make sure all of these projects have a website and awesome branding…

Yesterday, I spent most of the day with my mom and her parents who are here for the summer from Florida. They were excited to meet their great-granddaughter for the first time and came bearing sage advice and pink onesies. I love them so much and miss them during the year–summers are the best since they started coming up here.

My grandpa drove Alice and me home. I hadn’t talked alone with him in years and as I explained everything I have been doing, everything I have going on in my life, I realized how much I have grown in the last few years. Last time I really hung out with my grandpa I was a high school brat and all I wanted to do was text my boyfriend. What a difference in the things we have to talk about.

Welp.
We have billions of OLD peony bushes at this new house with the most colorful, fragrant blooms. I can’t wait to split some of the bushes up and plant more.
Dave’s parents are over here visiting, helping him build a square foot garden.
Today the plan is to go shopping to find something that FITS ME for this upcoming photoshoot.
And pick up several sets of vintage metal lockers for CAMP (thank you Craigslist!).

I’ve been kind of quiet on the blogging/social communicating front lately because all I really ever have to say is I’m working hard and OMG I LOVE THIS BABY.

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photos from today

Posted on 19. May, 2010 by Princess Lasertron.

75 degrees.
Fresh-cut peonies from the yard.
New magazines.

(more…)

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today’s outfit and venturing out

Posted on 17. May, 2010 by Princess Lasertron.

Sitting on the couch feeding Alice for like every 25 seconds for the last few days made me decide that it’s time to get a laptop. If you’re one of the people who are waiting for an e-mail from me, you probably agree.

Dave and I packed up a little bag and took Alice to the store and looked over some options. I ended up with a slick little HP–I admit I chose it for looks but it got good reviews. I will be able to get more work done with an infant now, and I wanted a laptop for CAMP anyway–it’ll be nice to have when I start working away from home.

I love this dress and it’s kind of the only thing that fits me, so don’t get too excited about new outfits. Bummer that I cant nurse in it!

Dress: Tulle
Sweater: Merona
Bracelet: Forever 21
Sunglasses: Betsey Johnson
Bag: Shinzi Katoh

Alice was so good at the store! I held her in a wrap and she never fussed. It seems like she is turning out to be nocturnal like her mama. We’ll see how long that lasts–I don’t know her very well yet!

xo

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alice elfie’s birth story (part 2)

Posted on 15. May, 2010 by Princess Lasertron.

This is continued from the first part of Alice’s birth story published here.

So I continued with hard labor throughout Friday night. Some of you who follow me on Twitter read as my husband and I posted throughout the weekend. It started out fun keeping everyone updated, but as hours and hours passed and I was not progressing, there was really little to say except “Hour 24. No news yet,” “Hour 36, no news yet,” “Hour 45, still in labor,” “Hour 50. Still no baby.”

On Saturday, our birth instructor Kristen came to serve as a doula for Dave and I. Dave was able to take a much-needed nap and Kristen continued to encourage me and help me relax the pain away. She stayed with us for almost 24 hours. If she had not been there, Dave and I would have felt like giving up. It got to the point where I felt so mentally foggy–not just because of the pain, but mostly because of the exhaustion–that I couldn’t hear what people were saying, I couldn’t understand the questions the nurses were asking me, and I felt completely detached from my own body. The contractions were double and triple-peaking, and with my eyes closed I felt surrounded by gray haze, floating down an endless foggy tunnel before me.

Hour 55. Sunday morning. My birthday. Mother’s day.

I had not progressed past 4cm although I had the emotional signposts of someone at 7 or 8cm. I felt like I was unconscious, floating down that tunnel, and Dave kept waking me because I would stop breathing. My doctor and nurses had a realistic concern that I would not be able to push Alice out unless I got some rest. It was the most intense feeling I have ever had, but I know I could have withstood the pain until delivery. It was the exhaustion I could not endure. I had not had food or rest in almost three days.

Dave supported me as I lay in his arms on the edge of the delivery table. My contractions came, double and triple-peaking. Dave and Kristen really gave me what I needed at this time–they knew my wishes and helped me advocate for myself and consent to have an epidural. It was completely painless to me and Dave carefully lowered my body onto the bed where I slept for the next three hours.

Three hours later, a nurse woke me up and told me I was at 10cm and they could see Alice’s head. I sat up feeling alert, calm, and determined. I could feel the waves of contractions but I could not feel my legs or bottom. I felt the pressure increase, and I felt the instinct to push. In the mirror I saw my daughter’s birth.

The end of my labor was so bizarre–I was completely out of my body. I was somewhere else, and the woman everyone was supporting and helping was just a shell. And then at the end, it was all over so quickly. It was over as fast as the rest of the labor had been slow.

58 hours.

I no longer felt any regret about having an epidural. Do I want to have one next time? No, I want to try again to have a normal, natural birth. I don’t feel like Alice’s birth was normal–the heavy unexplained bleeding, 55 hours at 3cm while my contractions triple-peaked–and maybe a natural birth expert would disagree with me. But Dave, my doula Kristen, and the nurses and doctors were right–I could not have pushed Alice out without getting some rest. I knew that the epidural could have led to a cesarean section. I knew it could affect Alice’s alertness at birth and lead to other adverse outcomes. But I was lucky to have a brilliant anesthesiologist who helped me reach my goal instead of disempowering me after all of the work I had put in.

It was my entire support team–Dave, Kristen, my mom, the doctor and nurses, the anesthesiologist, even the friends I made in the birth class–who gave me the strength to succeed. Without them I think I would have submitted to my own discouragement, which I never did.

I truly had my best birth and everything I did led to the best outcome for me. I am so proud of myself. And the best moment of my entire life was when the doctor lifted her onto my chest and I saw the tears streaming down Dave’s smiling face as he placed his hand on her back. My entire life. There was no way I could have prepared for how beautiful that moment was.

I love my little family. We are going to have so much fun.

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welcoming alice elfie: a birth story (part 1)

Posted on 13. May, 2010 by Princess Lasertron.

Right now I am sitting down at my desktop computer. I used to sit here for 6-8 hours a day editing photos, writing, answering e-mails, uploading materials for customers, but for the last several days I have just been on the couch with my girl and my husband. Alice loves to sleep and nurse in a wrap, so that’s what we are doing as I finally sit down to process the events of the last week.

Last week. Seven days ago I went into labor. And she is now four days old.

On Thursday, I started having regular contractions. I had been having them every day so I ignored them and kept working. I sewed, worked on some blog posts, and scheduled meetings for the weekend with my graphic designer and planned to go visit CAMP to take photos of the buildout progress. As I sat here at the computer, the contractions started to distract me and I began to focus on relaxing through them.

My mom logged on that night and messaged me that she woke up because she suddenly had a feeling that I had gone into labor. My contractions didn’t feel jarringly painful enough to me, so I had still been ignoring them as false labor. When I started timing them at the encouragement of my mother, they were six minutes apart.

When Dave noticed me slowing down and asked how long the contractions were, he did not agree that it was false labor. He did not agree so much that he frantically ran through the house throwing food and clothes into a bag and ran outside through the rain with unwieldy car seat parts, struggling to install them quickly then just tossing them in the backseat to figure out later. I was just waddling around the house thinking “all of this fuss over false labor.”

Dave and I worked hard to bring Alice into the world in what we thought was the best possible way. After a lot of research and reading about anesthesia, pain management techniques, and post-partum care and recovery, we decided to use the Bradley Method to prepare for Alice’s birthday.

The Bradley Method is a natural childbirth philosophy that emphasizes pain management through relaxation and relies on a husband or coach to support the mother through labor. We took a 12-week class with a wonderful certified instructor named Kristen Treat and learned so much from her and the other couples. It was so much more than Lamaze or any other birth class I had looked into and we were totally prepared for a natural Bradley birth yet very informed about any medical interventions that could possibly take place.

Dave and I wanted to stay at home for as long as possible during labor, but because our hospital was about 35 minutes away (in my hometown, the same place where I was born), we also planned to leave early to ride out most of the labor at my parents house. So on Thursday night when my contractions were six minutes apart, we packed up the Little Red Car and hit 80,000,000 potholes on the way to my mom and dad’s. (I know, because I felt every one.)

All through Friday, Dave rested and I focused. After about 12 hours, the contractions decreased to about 12 minutes apart. I went for a long walk outside trying to make them pick up again. I chopped some vegetables and helped Dave make dinner. I drank pineapple juice. We were really doing everything right–not rushing it and focusing on relaxing the pain away. The hard labor had returned.

Suddenly Friday evening, I felt several huge gushes of fluid. I thought “This is it!! This is the day!” Unfortunately my water hadn’t broken. It was blood. It just kept streaming. I knew that during labor I should expect some blood–”pink-tinged mucus” is the delicate language I had read over and over. But this was abnormal and I couldn’t feel Alice moving. There was so much blood.

Dave rushed through red lights to get to the small hospital, and within 15 minutes my room was full of nurses, technicians, an anesthesiologist, and my doctor. He explained to me that we would likely have to do an emergency cesarean and I burst into tears. I knew there was little hope left for the natural birth I had been dreaming of and I felt like a failure. I felt like my body had failed me. I wondered what I had done wrong to ruin my chances for what I thought was my best birth. Would everyone think I gave up? I was filled with regret and I was essentially mourning the loss of the empowering birth experience I had planned for. This early time at the hospital on Friday night was so traumatic. I had never cried harder or louder–I felt a true personal loss.

This is where I still feel very sensitive. I hate it when people say things like, “At least you have a healthy baby.” Or, “That’s why you shouldn’t make plans for birth–it never goes according to plan.” It’s very hurtful. I don’t think it’s fair to imply that I am not grateful for my child or that I am selfish for wanting birth to be more than a “get the baby out” exercise. It is okay that I wanted to be treated as more than a baby-bearing vessel. I am not out to prove something and I’m not trying to be a martyr or get a medal. I just wanted a positive, empowering birth experience and I felt fully educated and aware of my options.

I was still having hard contractions and still gushing blood as the ultrasound technician carefully checked my placenta for any rupturing and tried to find the source of the bleeding. Alice’s heart was beating at a healthy pace and the tech found no ablation or rupturing.

I love my doctor–he has been my physician since I was young and throughout my pregnancy he fully supported all of my wishes. He never advised me to get an epidural, or scoffed at my plans to avoid induction. I think that in the “natural birth” community culture, there is some hostility toward the mainstream medical system. I understand why many women feel that way, but I love my doctor and my hospital. I feel heard, understood, and respected by everyone there.

My doctor understood my pain. He was rooting for me. When the reason for my bleeding wasn’t found, he agreed that we should just watch for a while rather than do a cesarean.

Now my girl is fussing. I will finish this tomorrow.
xo
meg

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meet alice.

Posted on 12. May, 2010 by Princess Lasertron.

I knew she would come on Sunday.
Dave and I are so in love with her. I think she is so beautiful.

Photo by Nick

What a story we have to tell you!
More tomorrow.

xo
meg

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today’s outfit and week 40

Posted on 06. May, 2010 by Princess Lasertron.

Thanks everyone for your sweet feedback on my last post. It felt good to get that out there and it feels great to think of the love that’s coming this baby’s way! I am feeling more and more like she’ll be here on Mother’s Day (my birthday) this Sunday.

I really didn’t want her to be born then–I’m a little possessive of that day. The whole month, actually (I do celebrate a “birthday month”). But as my mom always reminds me, “‘YOUR’ days are OVER.” While laughing maniacally.

Yesterday, my friend Eric and I went to Jones Bros Cupcakes, the newest bakery in town. They did a hush-hush soft opening on Saturday and sold over 2,000 cupcakes!

My initial impressions were extremely positive–Jones Bros has that beautiful stark, minimalist architecture that I love so much, and they also used some of my favorite typefaces (Neutraface, Archer, and something that looks like Hand Writing Multu) in their branding. No detail was spared–the scalloped circle imagery was found on top of each cupcake, on all of the signage and paper products, and even the coffee stirrers and tabletops (which were obviously custom-cut).

I ordered cinnamon sugar, red velvet, chocolate, and carrot cupcakes and they were given to me in an adorable box. I also had a hot chocolate that came with a delicious, generously sized homemade marshmallow. The details!!

Eric and I were grateful to sit down with two of the Jones brothers themselves and talk to them about their branding and buildout process (since we are going through that right now with CAMP), and they also shared some wisdom about the bumps and setbacks they hit along the way. I was more surprised to learn that this is the Jones brothers’ first venture in the food industry, considering how well-thought-out the whole experience was.

I’m excited to go back to Jones Bros Cupcakes and try more from their menu. I can also see it being a great meeting place throughout the year as we plan events and parties!

Dress: Old Navy
Shoes: Kenzie
Bag: BCBG
Necklace: Subversive for Target
Bracelet: Forever 21
Sunglasses: Betsey Johnson
Sneaky cat: Turbo

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